I Regret Hiring A Book Publicist

The questions I wish I'd asked first

MY EXPERIENCE

I didn’t want to hire a book publicist. I thought it would be a waste of money (I ended up spending over $15,000). On the surface, I thought I could promote my memoir. Widow in the City, A Memoir of Heartbreaks and Hookups, as well as, if not better, than a professional. On a deeper level, I was ambivalent about drawing attention to myself because I didn’t feel that my book deserved promotion.

Who was I to ask people to spend their hard earned money on something I wrote?

I decided to put my inflated ego and my feelings of unworthiness to the side when I found a publicist who understood I needed not only publicity, but emotional support. I also knew that many indie authors wish they had the budget to hire someone to promote their books. My thinking was, “Since I can afford it, shouldn’t I do it?”

I went forward and hired a PR team, but from the beginning, something was off with our communication. We began in October 2025, which I thought was plenty of time, before my May 5, 2026 launch date. They told me we had to start right away, and I felt rushed to hire them. In hindsight they were right, but I highlight this as the first time I didn’t listen to my intuition telling me to slow down.

I was sent a contract detailing the number of hours the team would dedicate to my campaign during the 6 months leading up to my launch, (I chose 80 hours, their minimum). I also hired them to create my author website and to help me organize three launch events.

The first hiccup occurred a couple of weeks later when they posted my manuscript on Netgalley. It was already part of the package I paid for, and I thought it would be good to get some early reviews. My memoir is pretty raw, and contains several sex scenes, so I knew it wasn’t for everyone.

Maybe this wasn’t such a big deal, but I was concerned that my publicist wasn’t vetting advanced readers and that anyone on Netgalley could download the book. I voiced my concerns in a longer email thread with my publicity team:

I know it’s only been a week but two mediocre reviews from 65 downloads isn’t great. The well written review is from a fellow writer and my friend, so I wouldn’t have needed NetGalley for that. Additionally, almost half the people disliked my cover, which prejudices people against what’s written inside. Honestly, I don’t think my audience is there and I don’t want to dilute sales by advertising to my Substack subscribers that the book is available for free. What are your thoughts?

Looking back, I should have discussed this issue over a phone call. I see it may have come off as overly harsh as I was feeling upset and unsupported. This could have been avoided if I had asked more questions about their use and expectations for Netgalley. I had an indie author friend who vetted requests for advanced copies of her book and that’s what I expected too.

After I sent the email I got a call from the director of the agency. They let me know in the nicest possible way that everyone on my team was working really hard for me. They said that I hurt the team’s feelings and hinted that maybe I was going to be a problem client. I felt awful, and worried that I had ruined my relationship with the people promoting my book.

I felt so bad that I decided to end my contract in a written email. It was mid November 2025 and there was still time to hire someone else, or do publicity myself. The director called me and convinced me to stay. They said my book deserved publicity and that the team really liked me and my book. They offered more support by sending a weekly email update about the campaign.

Something was still missing, but I didn’t know what it was. Again, our communication was off. I can see now that I needed more detailed information than they provided. Each week I received an update about Netgalley reviews and downloads and links to the industry reviews I paid for: Kirkus, Los Angeles Book Review and BookLife, (the indie arm of Publisher’s Weekly).

They also let me know they were working on pitches for a curated list of media outlets. I should have asked to see the list, but I didn’t. By the end of February 2026 I’d been invited to appear on two small podcasts and a couple of others had received advanced copies of my book. I had no idea what to expect in terms of media coverage, but I wasn’t happy about doing several podcasts specifically about widows.

Again, I see this as my fault because I hadn’t asked for more details ahead of time. I know that many authors would prefer to be left out of the details, and they are happy to be told where and when to show up for interviews, but that isn’t me. For better or worse, I was not okay with giving up control over my time and not knowing where I might be spending my limited energy.

Back in November I let my publicity team know I was having a tough time finding a high school for my son. He would be graduating from middle school in June 2026 and it was bringing up all kinds of grief. My son’s school was a second home after my husband died. It was the one place I felt he was safe when he wasn’t with me. Looking at high schools was bittersweet. I’m so proud of my son and how far he has come, but it’s painful that my husband isn’t here to see it.

As far as I knew, I only had a couple of podcasts set up and I had already paid the agency more than $15,000. I was very happy with the author website they had created, but I still had no idea where they had pitched my book. I felt so vulnerable and began to think no one was interested in my memoir.

I sent an email asking if we could share a list of the outlets they had pitched and the status for each and I heard nothing (they were all at annual AWP conference, but I didn’t know that). After a day and a half I knew I couldn’t keep working with them. I told them our needs were not aligned and I was walking away. I instantly felt relieved, which told me I had done the right thing.

The director seemed surprised in their email response and asked me what they should do about all the interviews they had set up. I only knew of one meeting, which I offered to cancel myself. We ended on friendly terms and they offered to send me the “Hits List” they were working on. I was surprised when I got it, and frustrated that they hadn’t kept me updated the way I had asked. There was a list of podcasts and some other stats in the document they sent in addition to the following:

I'll never know if doing all these interviews would have helped with sales.

MY TAKEAWAY

I think the company did a good job in terms of publicity, and I know that many authors, both indie and traditionally published, are thrilled with their work. They are also what I call “good people” who care deeply about books and authors. I wish it had worked out for me, and it’s mostly my fault that it didn’t.

My advice for anyone looking to hire a book publicist is to be clear about your expectations. Do you want to do as many podcasts as possible, or are there a couple you have your eye on? Are you being realistic about which podcasts will invite you for an interview? What other type of coverage is possible? Youtube shows? Regional TV newscasts? Magazines? Cable TV?

In my case I had no idea what the possibilities were, which would have been fine if I was okay with just casting my net far and wide. I wanted to know where I was being pitched. I should have researched what was possible, what was a realistic goal and what was a reach. I should have done my homework, but I didn’t.

I hope you can learn from my experience, especially my mistakes. Promoting a book, especially a memoir, takes an emotional toll. Authors are putting their works of art out into the world and asking strangers to like them. Memoirs usually center around some type of trauma (would we write about our perfect childhoods?) making authors feel more vulnerable. Old wounds of unworthiness can stop authors in their tracks–that’s what happened to me. I don’t want that to happen to you.

---

REFLECTIONS AT 2.5 MONTHS POST LAUNCH

As I fill out a spreadsheet of all my PR Hits to send to my publisher (She Writes Press) I feel proud of all that I have accomplished. See articles below for more details:

I can do a follow up detailing how much I ended up spending on publicity and marketing as an indie author, but in the meantime read this excellent post by traditionally published author Amy Chan 👇

I Spent $44,000 Launching My Book. Three of Those Dollars Worked.

If you have additional questions, let me know in the comments. I’ve learned a lot along the way!