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Dr Vicki Connop's avatar

Yes to all of this! I've had similar requests, and politely declined explaining that I only make recommendations after reading and engaging and valuing someone's content over a period of time - it feels important in building trust with my readers to not recommend something I cannot stand behind. Thanks for articulating Substack etiquette for those who need it 😊

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Thank you for restacking. I’m glad this post resonated with you. 🥰

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Sarah Fay's avatar

Thank you so much, Amy! This means so much to me.

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Sari Botton's avatar

Thank you for supporting me by getting my book! And for sharing it here, in such good company!

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kaylen alexandra's avatar

Sari says it best! Thank you so much Amy!! And I am on the last few pages of Bad Vibes Only by Nora McInerny- I love to see overlap in our reading tastes!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

I love you K! The spine of your workbook was blank, so it wasn't in the photo, but I have it! Very happy to recommend it 🥰

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kaylen alexandra's avatar

🥹🙏🌹 thank you so much for supporting, dear Amy!!

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Kristine Kopperud's avatar

@Jeannine Ouellette!

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Sally-Shakti Willow's avatar

Super useful - I appreciate you sharing your wisdom and experience here. I'm new to Substack, so I'm reading, listening, learning and following... Thank you!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Hi Sally, Welcome to Substack! I'm so happy you found this post useful 🥰

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Sally-Shakti Willow's avatar

Thank you!

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Ahmadullah Abdul's avatar

I hope you don't mind me, though you and me are in the same boat, I m also new,but thanks to the Substack Team for supporting and helping me.

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Teyani Whitman's avatar

Beautiful guidelines. You’ve conveyed an important distinction between Substack and other social media sites, that being that Substack is not an exchange platform. It’s genuine. The connections are real, and authors truly care about their readers, as much as readers care about their authors.

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Thank you @Teyani Whitman 🥰. I’m glad that you found this post helpful.

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Megan Youngmee's avatar

I love the reciprocity here. after the internet taught everyone to take what they can for free.. i feel like this community is a lot about giving something back. If people can't afford it, even the comments, restacks and likes are huge. Loved this! Spread the love.

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Welcome @Megan Youngmee ! I just read your incredible intro post. What a journey you have been on. I liked what you wrote about Aspergers because I struggle with how to describe my son (he’s 12) without sounding ableist. High functioning autism doesn’t sound right, but I do recognize that Aspergers is not just part of the autism spectrum. Although not an official diagnosis, there are a few schools for kids who are twice exceptional, or 2e, meaning these students have extra challenges and gifts which varies by child. It’s strange because any type of asynchronous development is seen as a “disability” so technically being gifted is also a special need. Sorry, I’m rambling. I’ll finish by saying that I think there’s a book inside you and I’m ready to buy it when it’s published.

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Megan Youngmee's avatar

Thanks so much for popping over. Appreciate it greatly and am humbled by your encouragement. Regarding neurodiversity: Man I get that so much. I have so many thoughts around the conversation—especially around the sensitivities and perceptive layers that are a facet of autism. So many of the labels I find, make it more challenging to just meet the person where they are with both the needs and the gifts.

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Amy Blackstone, PhD's avatar

New Substacker here. This is so helpful. Thank you for offering tangible, doable to do's. I'm on it!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Welcome @Amy Blackstone, PhD ! I’m so glad you found this post useful 🥰

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Debbie Weiss's avatar

Thank you so much for including my book on your list! That means a lot to me!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Completely my pleasure 🥰❤️

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Dina Alvarez's avatar

Amy, I am so incredibly appreciative that you shared Midlife Private Parts which I co-edited with Dina Aronson. It means the world to us to be in this supportive and soulful community - and thank you for your wise words.

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

It's my pleasure to promote this wonderful anthology and I can't wait to get my copy (yes, I preordered it already!).

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Dina Alvarez's avatar

That is amazing - thank you so much. Really appreciate it!

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Dr Debra Campbell's avatar

I appreciate you ❤️

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Loved this, Amy!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Thank you so much Chris!

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Nan Tepper's avatar

Lovely! Lovely! Lovely! Just wonderful. And all the guidelines are terrific. I’m going to teach something like them in my class tomorrow night. I had to shut someone down recently who I don’t know because she started sending me links in the chat/DM. I asked her why she was doing it and she told me that she read my stack. When she a second post I asked her to stop. It was weird and uncomfortable. Good post Amy!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Thank you Nan! 🥰❤️

As for the DMs and the assumption of quid pro quo for subscribing and/or recommending another stack, I don't get it. You're right, it is weird, but I think that maybe when people are just getting started they don't know any better? I try not to attach a malicious intent to their actions and just ignore them. I'm sorry you had that uncomfortable situation, sometimes we're damned if we engage and damned if we don't.

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Nan Tepper's avatar

I think you're right about the possibility that they might be new to the platform, but it just seems super nervy to me. I don't know. I'm so into supporting other writers (as I think you know) and you are, too. But there has to be some basis for that support. Like reading their great work, or a connection to someone through others. I'm so busy that I barely have time to read the writers I subscribe to. And my tendency, as I work at letting go of my codependent, people-pleasing behaviors, is to want to take care of everyone else, before I tend to my own needs. Love you, cookie! xo

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Prajna O'Hara's avatar

Amy, thank you so much for buying my book and listing it here with these amazing Substack authors. I feel encouraged and inspired to read the books I have not read yet. I am touched. This means so much to me. I'm going to restack your beautiful post! With love, P

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

You have so much wisdom to share and you write beautifully. I’m happy to support you, Prajna. XO 🥰❤️

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Prajna O'Hara's avatar

I really needed to hear this today. As I am having a hard time getting to the computer it’s a bit nutty here right now for the new kitten that came with fleas. Urgh

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

Ugh is right, fleas! I’m sorry you are having a hard time and happy that I could do something to make you feel a little better (and appreciated). 🥰

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Prajna O'Hara's avatar

Thank you for your kindness Amy. We’re moving through the unexpected, as always, life is full of surprises.

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Skylar Liberty Rose's avatar

This is super helpful! And thank you for sharing Midlife Private Parts as one to pre-order 🥰

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

My pleasure! I can’t wait to read your essay 🥰

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Story Carrier's avatar

Thank you so much for buying and sharing my book! I'm humbled. And, like you, I tend to buy books by authors I've found on Substack!

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Amy Gabrielle's avatar

You are so welcome! 🥰

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