clever, hilarious, empowering, smart. You are one hell of an inspiration to me, Amy. There are parts of my sober story that involve an intersection of grief and sex and your bravery and honesty are helping me think that maybe I could and should share some of this tender part of my story. I am still struggling with shame, but you are helping to build my courage muscle. THANK YOU.
Rosemary, your comment touched my heart, and I wanted to know more about your story. I just read your post, The Sunday Scaries, Episode 1, and I am hooked. You write so courageously and honestly, I know you will help a lot of other women, including me. Our circumstances may be different, but we share so many of the same feelings as women in our 50s facing major life changes. You are brave, and I have no doubt you will tell all of your story when you are ready. There’s no rush. One area in which I have not been successful is finding a new relationship. You inspire me with your ability to trust a new man. I look forward to reading more of your story as it unfolds and you feel ready to share. Hugs, Amy 🥰
PS-I am going to start offering a Zoom gathering for those who identify as women. Keep your eyes out. It will be much like a sober meeting but with writing prompts and discussion around relationships, sex, codependency, boundaries, discerning wants versus needs, grief, dating, etc. I am still fleshing out the details, but the dream has been growing inside me for over two years.
Sounds wonderful 🥰. I’ll be on the lookout 👀. Thank you for thinking of me 🙏. Btw, I can relate to both the excitement of your daughter’s wedding, while dreading it too. Seeing your ex and his family will ultimately be fine, but the anticipatory anxiety is real!
Amy! Gah. Your kind and encouraging words feel like pure sunshine in my heart. Thank you so much for reading my stack and for subscribing. I am honored. We do have some overlap and that is part of why I am drawn to your story as well. My path to being in a committed, healthy-ish relationship was a windy and rocky one for sure. I do want to share more about my journey though because I do believe by sharing our story we help others, especially when it comes to love and sex, topics many give a lot of surface talk and time to but rarely give much authenticity and depth too. You are one of the exceptions. I want to change-or at least contribute to-the conversation with more depth and authenticity. <Also, I hopped over to your IG account: so hot! sensual, beautiful, and real>.
I’ve subscribed Rosemary… I want to hear/read your stories. Amy is normalizing female bodies and sexual conversations and I’m all for that 100%. I may be the exception at 80… but my senior center offers pelvic floor courses…including sexual activity; the discussions, tools/toys, stories women want to share …my peer group… you would not believe! Single or married… we will not go back! We are okay sharing last night’s activities, having friends with benefits, advocating protection, sharing new ways etc! Let’s write our stories out loud. No shame or blushing allowed. 😉😅
Joan, I want to be you when I grow up. Just kidding, neither one of us is ever growing up 🤣🤣🤣. In all seriousness, you bring a lot of joy into my heart. Thank you. 🥰🙏❤️
I read all the comments and commented on many of them .
I didn’t want this conversation to end
This is one of the best things I have found on Substack yet along with my buddy Abigail Thomas .
I have to listen to the recording. I don’t know where it is. I’m on my phone and I can never find things properly.
But I do know my body parts.
Damn, I have so many stories
I hang out for relaxation at a clothing, optional garden, hot tub, sauna, cold plunge
I’m quite loud sometimes not intentionally but the cold plunge is so exciting
I’m 66 whatever that’s supposed to mean but the greatest compliment I get is the young women who say I want to be like you when I grow up when they hear me just being myself.
Thank you so much for this. I look forward to more.
I’m getting ready to go away for about 2 1/2 weeks to Europe. If you start this group that you’re speaking about I hope I don’t miss it.
This is such a generous comment, wowza! Prajna, whenever you feel ready, write your stories. We’ve already lost so much of women’s personal histories. We may know facts and dates, but there’s still a “to-do” when women feel safe enough to tell their own sexual stories openly and honestly. Rock on, and thank you for making my day 🙏❤️🙏❤️
Loved this. But in reading the comments I’m wondering why it’s taken many of us the loss of a husband (mine through divorce) to love our bodies. I love mine now, I’m proud of it and I don’t mind showing it off, although I’m not as brave as you.
I hope reading this sort of thing will help other women, younger, like my daughters, to realise that they need to love their bodies now. That they are perfect as they are. ALL of them.
Hi Georgia! First, thank you for the compliment. Second, I love that you are thinking about younger women and your daughters and hoping that we can show them it's never too soon to start loving their bodies.
I'm so glad you love your body now, post divorce, and I do wonder if losing our partners somehow leads us back to self love. I think it could also be about our age. We look back at all the time we wasted feeling bad about ourselves, while looking forward and realizing we are not immortal.
At some point in our late 30s, maybe earlier, we become invisible to men. All the energy we put into trying to protect ourselves from the "male gaze" is suddenly freed up to focus on ourselves. No one is looking at us, so we feel like we can do whatever the f*ck we want. I also think it's no coincidence that women carry the physical, mental and emotional loads of childcare and 'running' a household.
Here in the US there's no universal childcare, so basically from birth to 4 or 5 years old, women are juggling the kids. It's so isolating and lonely, the mom guilt can be awful, so it's easy to manipulate women into feeling bad about their bodies. I could write all day about how the the deck is intentionally stacked against women. It's maddening!
Yes, it was such a waste of time feeling bad about myself and caring so much what other people thought. For me that stems from childhood. I was part of a strict religious cult and it was drummed into me how I always had to look good and act properly like a lady, like a christian, or it would reflect badly on god 🙄. I’m only getting out of that mentality now in my 50s. But boy does it feel good to leave it all behind! It’s so freeing, liberating.
I feel like this took the "tits and ass" song from a chorus line to a whole new level and I am HERE FOR IT. This poem and Snoop at the Olympics have saved my night. Love this and YOU!
Oh Amy… you are amazing! So visual.. in both words and voice! You have pushed boundaries and stereotypes so high, we can/will never go back!! I love your classy confidence and poise… tag every woman who wants control and pride for our bodies! Brilliant and powerful, Jenny! 😉🤗🥰❤️
Thank you my dearest Joan! I love how you just "get" me! And you are so right, we won't go back to feeling ashamed of our wonderful bodies. My vagina is literally a life giving portal to consciousness on Earth; you can't get much more powerful than that.🥰😍❤️
When my husband passed I learned to love my body tummy, boobies,asshole and all.
I found a website “Fetlife”. Took photos just like you and shared them with no care in the world. I posted kinky pictures galore with no judgment from others.
Found a few friends to share my ambitious sexual side.
I learned quite a bit and enjoyed every minute of it.
It’s so important to feel good about yourself and let that freak flag fly.
Thank you so much for being so open and honest and sharing your story.
Thank you for sharing your story with me! I thought I was the only one flying this particular model of freak flag. There are no words to accurately describe the isolation of widowhood. It's lonely, and freeing at the same time. It's the end of the person you were, and the beginning of who you choose to become. I wish you didn't know first hand exactly how I feel, and I'm grateful that you do. 🙏🥰🙏🥰
I am absolutely fascinated by this description of widowhood, @Amy Gabrielle. Ending the person you were and choosing who to become is exactly how I would describe my time after I divorced the "practice husband."
I know that divorce is not the same as a spouse dying, but in many ways the loss can feel the same. It’s the end of a significant part of our identity, even if it was something we chose and wanted (in the case of some divorces). For every ending there is a new beginning, and we get to choose how we move forward. Time doesn’t stop, so we either stay stuck in grief and longing for what was, or we can grieve and grow. We can choose to learn the tools we will need to move forward. Writing is a great tool, as is reaching out to others who have been through a similar loss. It makes sense to me that you chose to grieve and grow after the “practice husband” and you found Mr J. You choose who you wanted to become and you did it. I’m super inspired by you Anne. I missed you, and I’m sorry it’s been so difficult.
Thank you so much ☺️ 🙏
You're welcome. I'm hetero. I can't help it I was just born that way....;)
clever, hilarious, empowering, smart. You are one hell of an inspiration to me, Amy. There are parts of my sober story that involve an intersection of grief and sex and your bravery and honesty are helping me think that maybe I could and should share some of this tender part of my story. I am still struggling with shame, but you are helping to build my courage muscle. THANK YOU.
Rosemary, your comment touched my heart, and I wanted to know more about your story. I just read your post, The Sunday Scaries, Episode 1, and I am hooked. You write so courageously and honestly, I know you will help a lot of other women, including me. Our circumstances may be different, but we share so many of the same feelings as women in our 50s facing major life changes. You are brave, and I have no doubt you will tell all of your story when you are ready. There’s no rush. One area in which I have not been successful is finding a new relationship. You inspire me with your ability to trust a new man. I look forward to reading more of your story as it unfolds and you feel ready to share. Hugs, Amy 🥰
PS-I am going to start offering a Zoom gathering for those who identify as women. Keep your eyes out. It will be much like a sober meeting but with writing prompts and discussion around relationships, sex, codependency, boundaries, discerning wants versus needs, grief, dating, etc. I am still fleshing out the details, but the dream has been growing inside me for over two years.
Sounds wonderful 🥰. I’ll be on the lookout 👀. Thank you for thinking of me 🙏. Btw, I can relate to both the excitement of your daughter’s wedding, while dreading it too. Seeing your ex and his family will ultimately be fine, but the anticipatory anxiety is real!
yes, exactly!
Amy! Gah. Your kind and encouraging words feel like pure sunshine in my heart. Thank you so much for reading my stack and for subscribing. I am honored. We do have some overlap and that is part of why I am drawn to your story as well. My path to being in a committed, healthy-ish relationship was a windy and rocky one for sure. I do want to share more about my journey though because I do believe by sharing our story we help others, especially when it comes to love and sex, topics many give a lot of surface talk and time to but rarely give much authenticity and depth too. You are one of the exceptions. I want to change-or at least contribute to-the conversation with more depth and authenticity. <Also, I hopped over to your IG account: so hot! sensual, beautiful, and real>.
Beautiful exchange
I co-sign all parts
Especially tits and butts
Glorious
Thank you Colin.
I’ve subscribed Rosemary… I want to hear/read your stories. Amy is normalizing female bodies and sexual conversations and I’m all for that 100%. I may be the exception at 80… but my senior center offers pelvic floor courses…including sexual activity; the discussions, tools/toys, stories women want to share …my peer group… you would not believe! Single or married… we will not go back! We are okay sharing last night’s activities, having friends with benefits, advocating protection, sharing new ways etc! Let’s write our stories out loud. No shame or blushing allowed. 😉😅
Joan, I want to be you when I grow up. Just kidding, neither one of us is ever growing up 🤣🤣🤣. In all seriousness, you bring a lot of joy into my heart. Thank you. 🥰🙏❤️
Joan!! I love this. I’m excited and intrigued by your content. Love your spirit. Thank you for subscribing. 😍
Hello Amy
I had no idea!
Holy fucking sex goddess .
I read all the comments and commented on many of them .
I didn’t want this conversation to end
This is one of the best things I have found on Substack yet along with my buddy Abigail Thomas .
I have to listen to the recording. I don’t know where it is. I’m on my phone and I can never find things properly.
But I do know my body parts.
Damn, I have so many stories
I hang out for relaxation at a clothing, optional garden, hot tub, sauna, cold plunge
I’m quite loud sometimes not intentionally but the cold plunge is so exciting
I’m 66 whatever that’s supposed to mean but the greatest compliment I get is the young women who say I want to be like you when I grow up when they hear me just being myself.
Thank you so much for this. I look forward to more.
I’m getting ready to go away for about 2 1/2 weeks to Europe. If you start this group that you’re speaking about I hope I don’t miss it.
💜😂💥
Yes, brilliant !
This is such a generous comment, wowza! Prajna, whenever you feel ready, write your stories. We’ve already lost so much of women’s personal histories. We may know facts and dates, but there’s still a “to-do” when women feel safe enough to tell their own sexual stories openly and honestly. Rock on, and thank you for making my day 🙏❤️🙏❤️
Yes they’ll come!
Oh, how I giggled and then squealed with delight! So funny and smart!
Thank you Stephanie! I have a huge grin on my face thinking about you giggling and your squeal of delight while listening (or reading) my silliness 🤣
Loved this. But in reading the comments I’m wondering why it’s taken many of us the loss of a husband (mine through divorce) to love our bodies. I love mine now, I’m proud of it and I don’t mind showing it off, although I’m not as brave as you.
I hope reading this sort of thing will help other women, younger, like my daughters, to realise that they need to love their bodies now. That they are perfect as they are. ALL of them.
Hi Georgia! First, thank you for the compliment. Second, I love that you are thinking about younger women and your daughters and hoping that we can show them it's never too soon to start loving their bodies.
I'm so glad you love your body now, post divorce, and I do wonder if losing our partners somehow leads us back to self love. I think it could also be about our age. We look back at all the time we wasted feeling bad about ourselves, while looking forward and realizing we are not immortal.
At some point in our late 30s, maybe earlier, we become invisible to men. All the energy we put into trying to protect ourselves from the "male gaze" is suddenly freed up to focus on ourselves. No one is looking at us, so we feel like we can do whatever the f*ck we want. I also think it's no coincidence that women carry the physical, mental and emotional loads of childcare and 'running' a household.
Here in the US there's no universal childcare, so basically from birth to 4 or 5 years old, women are juggling the kids. It's so isolating and lonely, the mom guilt can be awful, so it's easy to manipulate women into feeling bad about their bodies. I could write all day about how the the deck is intentionally stacked against women. It's maddening!
Yes, it was such a waste of time feeling bad about myself and caring so much what other people thought. For me that stems from childhood. I was part of a strict religious cult and it was drummed into me how I always had to look good and act properly like a lady, like a christian, or it would reflect badly on god 🙄. I’m only getting out of that mentality now in my 50s. But boy does it feel good to leave it all behind! It’s so freeing, liberating.
Co-signed all of this
I’m blushing, too, just to be one the safe side! Never know these days whether to leer or leave.
Love it. “Closeups of my asshole; Were some of the best. “ They’d probably relegate mine to live in the bell tower 🙃
Thank you so much Renee! Oh, I think you’d be surprised at how beautiful your own body is to yourself if you look at it from all angles. 🥰😍
I feel like this took the "tits and ass" song from a chorus line to a whole new level and I am HERE FOR IT. This poem and Snoop at the Olympics have saved my night. Love this and YOU!
Thank you so much Kendall! I’m so happy your night has been saved by my tits and ass! 🤣🤣🤣
Ha—brilliant!
I love hearing you read, you sound so cheeky!!
Thank you so much Beth! I don't know that I've ever been called 'cheeky', but I like it 🥰🤣🤣
Oh Amy… you are amazing! So visual.. in both words and voice! You have pushed boundaries and stereotypes so high, we can/will never go back!! I love your classy confidence and poise… tag every woman who wants control and pride for our bodies! Brilliant and powerful, Jenny! 😉🤗🥰❤️
Thank you my dearest Joan! I love how you just "get" me! And you are so right, we won't go back to feeling ashamed of our wonderful bodies. My vagina is literally a life giving portal to consciousness on Earth; you can't get much more powerful than that.🥰😍❤️
Well, not giving life anymore but healthy and happy! 😉🤭Of course I get you… you say/do all the things out loud… I’m just a nice ol’ lady with a FWB! 😅
Brilliant
Thank you Rachel, that’s quite a compliment! 🥰😍🙏
Amy's talents extend
Beyond showing her body
She also shows off
With words that are naughty
Words and pictures together--
My gosh, what a rush!
The kind of thing that would make
Dr. Seuss blush.
I remember those OF pics
How they astounded
All clothing discarded
Her exposure unbounded!
But, dear Amy, your curious fans
Want to know:
That lovely sweet asshole . . .
Oh where did it go?
KIsses.
Touché mon ami. I'm sure you do remember my OF pics, they were unforgettable. Kisses back at you 🥰🤣
People are staring I’m laughing too loud apparently. Maybe I should recite it aloud!🤣
Hahaha! I'm so happy I made you laugh 🤣. You could always turn up your volume and play the audio of me reading it 🤣.
😂
This is such a fun and powerful post! :)
Thank you Katrina! I had fun writing and recording it. I’m really happy you liked it 🥰🙏
I LOVE this poem! Very clever and wonderfully stated.
Thank you Beth! Sometimes I just need to have fun with the craziness in life.
I share a lot of your story…
When my husband passed I learned to love my body tummy, boobies,asshole and all.
I found a website “Fetlife”. Took photos just like you and shared them with no care in the world. I posted kinky pictures galore with no judgment from others.
Found a few friends to share my ambitious sexual side.
I learned quite a bit and enjoyed every minute of it.
It’s so important to feel good about yourself and let that freak flag fly.
Thank you so much for being so open and honest and sharing your story.
Thank you for sharing your story with me! I thought I was the only one flying this particular model of freak flag. There are no words to accurately describe the isolation of widowhood. It's lonely, and freeing at the same time. It's the end of the person you were, and the beginning of who you choose to become. I wish you didn't know first hand exactly how I feel, and I'm grateful that you do. 🙏🥰🙏🥰
I am absolutely fascinated by this description of widowhood, @Amy Gabrielle. Ending the person you were and choosing who to become is exactly how I would describe my time after I divorced the "practice husband."
I know that divorce is not the same as a spouse dying, but in many ways the loss can feel the same. It’s the end of a significant part of our identity, even if it was something we chose and wanted (in the case of some divorces). For every ending there is a new beginning, and we get to choose how we move forward. Time doesn’t stop, so we either stay stuck in grief and longing for what was, or we can grieve and grow. We can choose to learn the tools we will need to move forward. Writing is a great tool, as is reaching out to others who have been through a similar loss. It makes sense to me that you chose to grieve and grow after the “practice husband” and you found Mr J. You choose who you wanted to become and you did it. I’m super inspired by you Anne. I missed you, and I’m sorry it’s been so difficult.